Canologie
by Tawnyblood
Summary: Prussnologie? Canologie? What? Short story drabbles that are based on Mikunologie.


He sat in front of the fullbody mirror, preening at his dashing good appearance. Smirk on his face, Gilbert reached for the fedora he had earlier thrown off to the side. Slicking his hair back (not that it does much to his hair), he plopped the off-black hat onto his head. Standing up, he tugged at the bottom of his black jacket; smirk growing larger by the second (especially when he caught sight of himself in the mirror). He threw a wink at his reflection before closing the gap between him and himself.

Shoulder leaning heavily against the class with legs crossed at the ankle, a free hand tipping the hat down so that it obscured his eyes and a feral grin on his face, he couldn't help, but state the facts.

A snort. "I am sooo awesome."

**_What is called 'Prussnologie.'_**

**_

* * *

_**

He frowned down at his… roommate. Who was more of a pet actually. A pet that couldn't even remember the man who feeds him. Okay, that was a sensitive topic that the blonde doesn't really like to dwell on it too much.

Matthew plopped down onto his butt, and pulled Kumajiro close to his body. A hand reached behind the fluffy head to scratch the bear's neck, a sensation Kumajiro had always been quite fond of. Something of a growl sounded deep in his chest as Matthew picked up his bear and set him onto the bed.

The blonde fixed the bear with a frown as the growling continued. "Kimchi, this is pretty… serious." He mumbled, mostly to himself, as yet again he reached over to scratch Kumajiro's neck. "And I'm not talking about your habit of just using me for your own personal good…" Matthew quickly added as an afterthought. "It's just… how do I get people to remember my name?"

"… Who are you?"

**_What is called…_**

**_

* * *

_**

"Can you repeat that?" Gilbert deadpanned, hand barely raised up in the air as he stared blankly at his tutor.

Matthew returned Gilbert's dead stare with his own dull one. Seriously, this was bordering ridiculous. And he was not talking about the fact that Gil refused to even look at him until he was wearing this _get-up._Seriously, something needs to be done about the albino's libido though. No, Matthew was talking about how he's been saying the same thing over and over for the past fifteen minutes. It was like Gilbert wasn't even listening to him!

Though knowing him, he probably wasn't…

"I don't get it. What's so hard about this?" Ouch, where was his mind going? He's been spending way too much time with Francis apparently.

Gilbert waggled his eyebrows at Matthew; the same almost feral smirk on his face. "Oh… I don't know." He responded innocently enough, but it wasn't very hard to pick up the sultry undertones with the way he kept eyeing the blonde in front of him. He tapped his pale fingers against the polished wood of his desk, red eyes drifting off to the side. That goddamn smirk was still on his face though.

"Maybe you should… teach me in a different way?"

**_I don't understand numbers and stuff at all._**

* * *

"Hey! Matthew! I don't get this, can you help me?"

"A-Ah… well, I don't get it too well either. You might want to talk to Roderich about it…"

Matthew watched as the back of his classmate disappeared to go seek out more… appropriate help for his assignment. Going at his work again, he honestly couldn't concentrate with this sense of curiosity flooding up his insides.

Why do people always go to him for help?

Why not Roderich or Elizabeta or _Gilbert_ for Pete's sake?

Gilbert was actually pretty good at math (okay, he's really good at it), while Matthew on the other hand was barely passing this class. People knew that he's not holding one of the highest grades in this course, but everybody acts like it. So why do most people go to him for help? It just doesn't make sense in his mind.

"Hey, Feliks…" He prodded his neighbor with his pencil, hoping to attract the cross-dressing male's attention.

"Like… who are—"

"Matthew, I'm Mattew."

It took the shorter blonde awhile, but it was a new record. Were people finally remembering him!? "Oh, Mattie! Like, what'cha need?" Feliks inquired, acting as if he totally didn't forget tablemate's name. The one who has been sitting there since the beginning of the year.

"I'm just curious… why do people keep asking me for help on the worksheet?"

"Well, duh, the answer is like so simple. You look smart."

Matthew didn't know whether or not to be flattered or peeved off by this new revelation.

**_But surprisingly, it looks like I'm very smart._**

**_

* * *

_**

Gilbert wasn't always self-centered. He thought of other people sometimes, he sometimes helped others, and he sometimes tries to do what's good for others. It's not his fault that everything he does links back to his narcissism. Okay, maybe it was his fault, but it's not like he can control how much _awesome_ he's radiating.

"You're doing it again."

"What! What am I doing again!"

"That-That whole… I'm awesome thing! You're doing it again!" Roderich snapped, arm motioning frantically at Gilbert's person.

"… I'm not! I haven't mentioned my awesomeness yet!" Gilbert snapped in return, honestly very confused at what Roderich was talking about. Not that he's letting it show or anything, but he's very puzzled. Very puzzled. Like, 'how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie pop' confused.

Was he going to have to drive it through this man's thick skull. Well, according to the look that Gilbert was giving him, he might have to. What a joyous event. "You were talking about the sun and how it provides life for everything which then somehow made it to you calling yourself the sun."

"Well… it's science."

The Austrian fixed his companion with an icy stare before talking. "For the past hour that you have been talking, you have referenced _everything_ to yourself. I think that's being quite selfcentric."

Gilbert stared at the brown haired man, before cracking a large smile. He reached over to tousle up the other man's hair. "… Well, that's just the way I am!"

_**What is called 'Prussnologie.'**_

_

* * *

_

"I really don't want to go to the doctor's…" Matthew cautioned, blue eyes warily staring at the doorway to _hell_ or his hell at least. One push towards the door and his body stiffened, feet digging into the concrete. He pushed backwards on the weight pressing him ahead, while muttering _no_ over and over under his breath.

It was a bit unsettling for Gilbert to listen to. It kind of reminded him of a cult chant…

"Come on! It's just a check up!" He mumbled a bit gruffly for somebody trying to comfort their friend. He continued shoving against the smaller male and soon realized that this was very similar to trying to push a skyscraper. It's just not doable with your bare hands. Moving onto Plan C.

Plan B is just out of the question. It involves a nice Canadian tush and a pale wandering hand. He has no problem commencing this plan, but he does have problems with walking around with a bruise on his face. That boy has a strong punch for somebody of his stature.

"What the hell is wrong with the doctor's? This is –what, your fifth doctor?!"

"I just… don't like doctors." Mattie finished rather meekly as he shuffled his feet, arms wrapped around his bear. It was the honest truth, nothing to be ashamed of, but Matthew couldn't fight back that creeping heat that brought color to his cheeks.

With a heavy sigh, Gilbert draped his arm over Mattie's shoulder as he –stealthily–herded the patient into the waiting room. Which then led him to wonder why they usually color the place white. Why not red or blue or green? Why white of all colors? It's so… unawesome; white isn't even a color!

"Why?" He asked, gently pushing the blonde into one of the seats as he wandered off to grab himself and Mattie a magazine.

"I'm not too sure. It's just that—Oh! Thank you!—they're so robotic sometimes, you know? It's… weird." Mattie explained, eyes drifting to the content inside the magazine in his hand. At the light pawing on his arm, he lifted up his arms to let Kumajiro jump to the ground and wander around.

Gilbert gave himself the little chance to watch the other people's face as the smaller-than-average polar bear wandered around, sniffing at people's belongings and shoes. The albino was working hard to stifle his laughter as people drew their feet up, horror dancing across their faces. But he almost lost it when a little girl ran up to Kumajiro and pulled him into a hug; her mother looked like she was about to have a heart attack or a seizure. Good thing they're waiting for the doctor, right?

"Hey, I had a lot of surgeries before –including ones where they actually had to put stuff into me— and I turned out perfectly awesome, didn't I?"

"… O-Of course…"

**_Renowned people tinker with my body several times._**

**_Apparently they embedded super circuits in me._**

_

* * *

_

He wiped away some of the dust that managed to gather itself at the corner of the monitor screen, red eyes not straying far from the static. Quickly looking both ways, he swiftly spat into the cloth and wiped away more of the dust, eyes narrowed and scanning the room for anybody who might have seen that. Stepping back away from the monitor, he took in the shine of the screen with a look of approval.

"Now that's spit-shine clean." A voice chirped from somewhere behind him.

The great Gilbert does not jump from a sudden sound, no, Gilbert just leapt into the air (in some kind of cool ninja move) and spun around after landing onto his feet. Pale lips pulled downwards in a scowl and vibrant red eyes glaring, Gilbert pondered over what that comment meant.

Though that pleased look on Mattie's face as he surveyed that screen softened up his look… just a bit.

"How was the green room?"

"Oh… really, um, green."

"No, _durh_." Gilbert muttered under his breath while he rolled his eyes. He folded the dust rag, but quickly threw it to the side (What was the point of folding it?) as he motioned for Mattie to take a seat at the table. "What was going on with the green screen? It took you long enough."

"Oh… there were some technical difficulties, but it's all fi—"

The loud slam of the door smashing against the wall brought both men's attention to the exit. There, in all his American glory was Alfred. And Kiku off to the side, hovering around him with a worried look on his face. "Attention Mattie and his crazy albino boyfriend! Please direct your attention to the monitor!" The door slammed shut before Mattie could stammer out, "He's not my boyfriend! Alfred!" But just as suddenly as before, it flung open again. "Thank you!" It slammed shut again.

The lights dimmed, an ominous song was playing in the background, and Alfred rushed out of the green room dragging behind him a sofa. He was followed shortly by Kiku; who was carrying many bowls of popcorn.

All four men migrated to the sofa and settled in as the credits and introduction passed them by on the large screen. It flashed a bright hue of blue before morphing into white. Then everything went dark and Alfred's grip on his popcorn bowl got tighter. A bright flash of light (Seriously, who let Alfred pick the transitions?) and there on the screen were the two brothers.

Flying.

Over a river.

Matthew looked downright miserable while Alfred struck his best superhero pose as they two soared through the sky.

Gilbert laughed.

**_I can fly in the sky._**

**_

* * *

_**

There was no point in hiding it.

Everybody knew.

It's just that it's harder for some people to admit compared to other people. Take Francis for example; the man would whole-heartedly agree with Gilbert, but then you take a look at Matthew… that man would blush, stammer, blush a darker shade, and look away. In that order.

Gilbert would know; he's been experimenting for the past… two days maybe? Or was it three days, it's getting a bit hard to keep track of the days now.

Damn messed up calendar with the interesting pictures.

Out that tiny corner of his eye, he could see the red-clad blonde pacing in front of the local café, something that Gil knows he does before going in to get his daily coffee fix. A smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth, he quickly checked his appearance in the nearest car window before jogging up to the man.

Why was he wearing this shirt again? It's so damn tight.

Oh yes, it's for the experiment… The things he does for science.

"_Hallo, meine Prinzessin_."

"O-Oh! G-Gil! What are you doing—Uh. Wh-What's up with the shirt…" He asked, face becoming a very nice shade of red, violet eyes drifting over Gilbert's choice of clothing. "It's really… um." He paused to cough into his fist using it as an opportunity to tear his gaze away from the shirt and look the albino in the eyes. "Different."

Gilbert waved the comment off. "How unawesome would it be if I didn't try new things once in awhile?"

"… I guess." A pause. "Um, Gil? Why are you standing so close to me?"

"I'm not standing close to you. This," He took a _huge_ step forward, effectively trapping the other male against the window pane. "This is being close to you."

Matthew cannot see where this was going, but he knows that he does not like it. He knows that he really doesn't like it. "Gil," He starts, eyebrows twitching a bit as he peers at Gil. "W-What are you doing?"

"… Nothing." He sings as a pale hand gathers up two tanner hands.

An eye twitched when Mattie tried to tug a hand away only to feel the grip tighten around his wrists. Curse his skinny (and grudgingly womanly) wrists! He presses more of his body against the window trying to put a good amount of space between their bodies. That look on Gilbert's face was not sending him good vibes.

And as sudden as a crack of lightning on a rainy night, that innocent smirk on his face was replaced by something more… predatory. The blonde could feel a lump in his throat and he couldn't help, but feel that it might have been easier to try and cough it out.

"Just say it and I'll let you go."

"Say wha—Oh… In that case, _never copper._"

"Just say it."

"No!"

"Say it or the curl gets it."

"WHAT!?" He flinched as he felt Gilbert's other hand ghost through his hair and flick his curl. Just that was enough to turn his knees to mush and the only way he remained upright was because he ended up using the older man's knee as a chair.

"Say it."

"Gil! There's people—"

"Say it!" Another flick to the curl turned Mattie's spine in jelly.

"Gil! Seriously! Don—"

"Just say it!" Mattie wished there weren't so many people around when Gilbert wrapped the curl around his finger.

"Come on, Mattie! Jus—"

"Okay! Okay! You're sexy! Can you please leave my curl alone now!?"

"… Okay!" A quick kiss to flushed cheeks and Gilbert was off like a dart.

**_And I have a sexy body._**

**_

* * *

_**

It became routine to burst through that brand new (and now barely working) door demanding pancakes and waffles and all those good stuff for breakfast… and lunch… and we can't forget dinner and supper too. And the occasional midnight snack.

Wait, getting off track.

Gilbert prowled through the Canadian's dimly lit kitchen, peeking out behind corners for anybody that might detain him from his mission. Mission Get Pancakes From Matthew ASAP. He stalked behind chairs and tables, poking his head up behind the sofa for a split second before sinking back down. He army crawled along the wooden floor, quickly wriggling his way over to the stairs. The albino waddled his way up the stairs, carefully dodging the sleeping walking Kumajiro. _Mattie should do something for him._ He thought to himself as he pushed the bedroom's door just a tiny bit…

"_Lullaby, twilight is spreading  
Silver wings over the sky;  
Fairy elves are softly treading…_"

Gilbert stopped in his tracks at the soothing sound of somebody's voice. Craning his neck, he caught of glimpse of the blonde pacing back and forth in front of his window and wrapped securely in his arms was Matthew's baby cousin who yawned and babbled something unintelligible.

Gilbert continued watching from the ground, a soft smile on his face, as Matthew continued singing a lullaby to the baby and Gilbert's eyes start fluttering… fluttering… fluttered closed.

Matthew set the baby back into her crib and rubbed his eyes. He stifled a yawn with his hand and sauntered over to his bed. And that was when he heard it. That muffled snoring noise. He inspected the room, eyes resting on the slightly ajar door. And it trailed down and rested on the limp body of a snoring Gilbert…

**_I'm good at singing too, but…_**

**_

* * *

_**

Oh, Christmas. The time of year when it's all family-orientated and people try to sell you useless crap that they say will bring your friend's happiness because you forgot to get them a present. It's the time of year when those kids don't have school and run amok in your local mall climbing all over this fat guy wearing a red suit. Oh, Christmas…

How Gilbert loathed it.

Gilbert watched the couples in the mall with narrowed eyes as he strolled through it, supposedly looking for a present for Mattie. Except he got, you know, sidetracked with all this green and red and white crap hanging all over the place and all those kissy faces the couples keep making at each other.

Oh Goddammit, what was he doing here again!?

Getting a present for Matthew, right!?

He stopped midstride just to glare at a young couple exchanging kisses on the bench. His lip pulled back into a snarl when the tinkling laughter of the girl's reached his ear. He fought back that familiar feeling that rose up from deep inside his stomach like bile, the feeling he refused to admit as loneliness.

Before he knew what was going on, he wear tearing out of that place as fast as his legs could go, stopping only when the key was in its slot.

Shit, he'll get a present for Mattie tomorrow.

**_Love is the only thing I don't have enough of!_**

**_

* * *

_**

"Hey Mattie, what's with all the bags?"

The blonde Canadian looked up from where he was packing his underwear away, a blush on his face when he realized that Gilbert's eyes weren't on him, but staring at the boxers he held in his hand. He quickly shoved them into the bag and it was only then when red eyes came to look him in the face.

"I uh, didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Gilbert questioned, walking farther into the room to sit on a blonde's bed. He flicked a piece of popcorn into his mouth as he watched the male in front of him like an owl.

"I'm uh, going on a field trip with Alfred and his friends to Washington, DC." The smaller man replied as he zipped up the bag.

"Why?"

"Just to, uh… see the world. You know?" Blue-violet eyes looked up into red ones.

Gilbert nodded knowingly.

**_Canologie, opens up the world._**

**_

* * *

_**

"Fuuuuuck. There's nothing to do." Gilbert groaned as he rolled over in a certain Frenchman's bed. He briefly watched Francis and Antonio for reactions, but getting none, he continued with his complaining. "UUURGH, why did Mattie have to leave? It's so boring here without him. You guys are so dull. Let's go to a club or something at least."

"Hey, Gilbert?"

"Yeah?"

Francis continues messing around on the computer. The other two occupants share a glance with each other before Antonio gets up from where he was playing his DS and strolls over to wear Francis is. Gilbert hears the beginnings of different songs. "Dude, Frenchie, what are you doing?"

"Just getting some music. And ta-dah~ It's there."

At the press of a button, Taylor Swift's _You Belong with Me_ suddenly started booming out of the loud speakers of Francis's computer. The other two stare blankly at the blonde, but the look goes unnoticed.

Gilbert was only able to catch a glimpse of what looked like a video chat before Antonio suddenly tackled him on the bed. _You Belong with Me_ was still playing at full blast from the speakers, but if he listened carefully, he could hear a very familiar and comforting chuckle…

"Come on! Let's dance, _amigo!_"

There was no protest or anything for Gilbert to jump to his feet and start playing the air guitar, all the while jumping and bouncing on Francis's poor bed as Antonio bashed about on imaginary drums, with head bangs and all those works. Francis stole a peek over his shoulder before rolling his eyes. He was going to have to get a new bed when they were done.

And that was when Matthew 'walked' in. Francis could hear something clattering to the ground via his live video chat and his blue eyes met with the speechless look of Matthew's face. The French blonde looked over to his shoulder to see that Gilbert and Antonio were still in their rockstar modes.

"Should I tell that you're…?"

"N-No…" A smile came to Matthew's face as he picked up his laptop for a better look Gilbert and Antonio jamming out to _You Belong with Me._ "It's makes camp a lot more interesting."

_**Prussnologie, but it's so boring.**_

_**

* * *

**_

The two sat on the couch in the middle of the night, snacking on whatever happens to be in the snack bowl (let's hope it's not bugs). All eyes were trained onto the television, including the beady black eyes of Kumajiro and Gilbird.

A pale near translucent hand fished around in the snack bowl that rested on Matthew's lap, trying to fish out any other goodies that might be in there. There was a low grunt from him and he did what most dared not to, he looked at the empty snack bowl. Urgh, it's _empty._

"Matt… it's empty."

"So go fill it." Said man replied nonchalantly, eyes still trained onto the screen, he nudged the bowl closer towards the Prussian.

Gilbert frowned at it and nudged it back towards the blonde. "Come on Birdie, can't you do it?"

This time the blonde looked at his buddy, even if it's just to frown at him. "Why can't you?"

"Just… please?" Initiating the 'please listen to me' look. None have ever survived it and Matthew was no exception. One look at those ruby red eyes staring at you like that made you want to jump through hoops for the Prussian.

"Arugh… fine." With a huff and a sigh, Matthew grabbed the bowl and left for the kitchen.

**_Canologie, I execute my instructions._**

**_

* * *

_**

Deep in the city night, the only sound are the occasional droning of late cars zooming by and the clinking and clattering of… spray paint cans?

With his head covered by a navy blue camouflage jacket, Matthew reluctantly handed his companion the purple spray paint can so that he could do his evil deeds. Well, not exactly evil, but definitely illegal. "Gil, your mask is kind of… getting kind of…" He didn't even try to find the words to tell Gilbert that the openings in the ski mask were beginning to face him.

The albino flippantly waved off the blonde as he popped the cap off and outlined the blue. In his other hand was a brush and with a single jerk of his head, Matthew sighed and presented him with the black paint. Gilbert quickly dipped the brush's head into it and doodled little stars among the purple and Prussian blue.

"Gilbert? Should you be doing this? It's illegal and aren't you on probation?"

It took a couple of minutes, but the silverette finally responded. "Mattie, Mattie, Mattie." He chided, eyes never straying from his illegal form of artwork. "Don't you know that people pay other people to draw graffiti?" There was a pause as Gilbert tried to draw a star.

"I know that Gil, but—"

"Red paint please."

_I don't even know why I try._ Matthew brought out the red paint and presented it to the German. He watched as Gilbert wrote down his home country's name in red. And in rather large letters, but it wasn't as big as _'THE AWESOME KINGDOM OF PRUSSIA.'_ Matthew sighed loudly. This was his supposed soulmate?

"Gil, it's not illegal if you're getting paid for it, but that's the problem! You're not getting paid!"

"That's what you think~" The taller male sung with a wink of his eye that was partly obscured by his ski mask. God, Matthew just hoped that nobody would think that they're trying to break into somebody's house.

"Gil, are you getting pai—"

Then the sirens came. The sirens from the police and before he knew what was happening, before he could even register that the police were coming for Gilbert and him, the albino grabbed him by the arm and dashed off towards their car…

Oh great, he's an accomplice to a criminal…

**_Prussnologie, but I don't get paid for it…_**

**_

* * *

_**

Matthew was currently staring at himself in the fullbody mirror that was in Gilbert's room. Nothing strange about that, right? It's pretty basic knowledge that Gilbert had a fullbody mirror in his room, but the weird part was that Matthew was wearing a _dress_ in Gilbert's room while staring at his reflection in said man's mirror. Yes, that part was weird… for him at least, Gilbert acted as if it was the most normal thing on the Earth.

"Gilbert? Why am I wearing a dress?" Matthew questioned a bit sternly as Feliks started to fuss over the petticoat he was wearing underneath. It was a full and tiered petticoat. Why was he wearing it when he was a man?

Gilbert, from where he sat on his bed munching on popcorn, just raised his eyebrows at Mattie's question. Such a weird question to ask, didn't he already explain? "It's for a fanservice request thing on my blog. Somebody asked for specifically," And that's when he made the air quotes. "Can you get your little 'Birdie' in a dress and post a picture of him in it? Please? I love you Ore-sama!" End air quotes.

How is he acting so damn calm!? "B-But… you actually memorized the quote!?"

"It had 'ore-sama' in it…"

"That's like, so not weird." Feliks chirped from where he was straightening Mattie's hair ornament. Wait, when did Feliks get that into his hair?

Gilbert shrugged and fished his phone out of his pocket before snapping a picture of Matthew. He saved it and looked up to see the flushed face of the Canadian glaring at him. "What? I want some progress pictures too, you know?" He cut in before the blonde could say anything. "Plus, it's not like I'm going to post those pictures of you in _just_ the petticoat…" The albino waggled his eyebrows at the smaller male and in retaliation Matthew grabbed the pincushion and chucked it at Gil's head. He didn't miss.

"Why me?"

"It's like, so obvious: you have a girly body. Duh."

Matthew wished he never heard that.

**_Canologie, and why is it that my body_**

**_

* * *

_**

It started out as a normal day, but that stopped right at the moment Gilbert came bursting through his door screaming out, "Birdie! Catch me!" And flung his whole entire body at the poor Canadian who was just on his way to the bathroom.

Thank God he didn't piss his pants when Gilbert flattened him like his favorite snack.

Though he did get the wind knocked out of him and a killer headache from his head smashing against his wooden floor. Man, he was going to get that carpeted sooner or later. Sooner preferably.

Struggling to get up, he pushed the dazed man off his chest and rubbed his head. He refused to admit that there were tears in his eyes. And where were his glasses? A blur of white running off with something in his mouth told him that answer.

"Gil? What was that for?"

"GODDAMIT!" Said man swore as he jumped to his feet. As a second thought did Gilbert help Matthew up to his feet, but he wasn't around long enough for Mattie to scold him. He was off like a lightning bolt, ranting about how he sooo didn't gain weight…

With all those pancakes he eats... SURE.

**_Prussnologie, weights an entire ton?_**

**_

* * *

_**

New Year's Resolutions were something that Gilbert was never happy about. The reason was very simple though, they meant perfecting yourself and what could you do to make that fine specimen (conveniently called Gilbert) even more… perfect? That's right, the answer is nothing!

Or Or at least that's what he thought.

"What do you mean I've gotten heavier? I haven't gotten heavier." The Prussian replied in between shoveling grand amounts of pancakes that died from drowning in maple syrup into his mouth. Oh yum, dead pancakes.

From the other side of the kitchen table, Matthew was munching on a waffle drenched with honey and maple syrup. "Gil, I think it's impossible for you to not gain weight with how much pancakes you're eating. I-I think you would be bigger than Kumamon if you were a… polar… bear." He finished rather meekly. The two stared at each other blankly before a flush came to his face and he nibbled on his breakfast.

"Are you saying I'm fat?"

"N-No!" Matthew answered honestly. It was true, it really was. Gilbert wasn't fat, he was just… getting there. Good Lord, he could suddenly realize why Kumajiro was so damn tubby… "Just think of it as having a… New Year's Resolution…"

**_Canologie, next time I'm upgraded

* * *

_**

She's been casting constant glances in Gilbert's direction, but it wasn't because she liked him or anything. On the contrary, she and Gilbert did not get along well at all, but they were able to put aside their differences when the time calls for it. The time does no call for it at the moment.

"Liz! Why the hell do you keep staring at me?"

"Huh?" She forced her gaze off his stomach. "What are you talking about?" She inquired innocently, fingers nervously fingering her jacket's hem. The Hungarian immediately stopped when Gilbert's eyes rested on her nervous tic and she cursed it in her mind. _Goddamn tic, I need to get rid of it for next week's Poker game._

"You keep staring at me!" He snapped, finger pointed accusingly in her direction. He looked to the man sitting next to him for support. "She keeps staring at me, doesn't she!?" Matthew flushed a pretty shade of red and looked away.

She clapped a hand over her heart, feigning a look of hurt. "Well I'm sorry that I can't keep my eyes off your stomach!" She dropped the look, a sneaky and mischievous one replacing it that caused Roderich to shuffle away from her. "Mattie, you should really regulate his diet. He tends to overindulge himself."

"What!? I do no—"

"Y-Yeah…" Mattie admitted ignoring that hurt and aghast look Gilbert was giving him. He fiddled with the edge of his red hoodie. "But then he looks at you with those puppy-dog eyes when you try to get that maple syrup away from him…" He raised his head to meet with Elizabeta's eyes.

She nodded knowingly. "He has a tendency of doing that even if he doesn't know it."

"I do no—"

"Yeah, so I can't take the maple syrup away from him and he gains weight…"

And that was the last time Gilbert tried interrupting them. As the two went on a rant on how Gilbert lacked self-control, he started poking his stomach. It wasn't that big was it? It jiggled. Oh yeah, he's going to hit the gym tomorrow.

**_Prussnologie, make me lighter!_**

**_

* * *

_**

_What is called…_

_What is called…_

_Canologie? Prussnologie?_


End file.
